Like any great film, life’s most intimate moments deserve a soundtrack. A single song can pull you into a moment, make your skin tingle, send you spiraling into nostalgia, or get you in the mood. My sex life has been a series of perfectly (and sometimes, chaotically) scored moments, captured in the sounds that shaped them.
TRACK 01 | BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER THEME SONG, NERF HERDER
I grew up watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer with my mother. It was an education I doubt she intended but one that shaped both my sexual and romantic development. Why wouldn’t you want a vampire climbing through your window at night? Spike, of course, was my first love. Despite the fact that this character was a maniacal, murderous, alcoholic vampire, my 10-year-old self thought, “this is the man for me.” I never quite got over him.
TRACK 02 | I’M WAITING FOR THE MAN, VELVET UNDERGROUND
My attraction to messy bad boys with a soft side followed me into my teenage years. Growing up in Los Angeles meant spending countless hours behind the wheel of car, which became a sanctuary for self-reflection, exploration, discovery, and some more illicit pleasures. Throughout high school The Velvet Underground’s Gold Album rarely left my CD player, and “I’m Waiting for the Man” was one song that never failed to get me in the mood. I’m sure raging hormones helped as well.
TRACK 03 | APRIL SKIES, JESUS AND MARY CHAIN
Jesus and Mary Chain’s Darklands album will always be a perfect soundtrack in my mind and the one that captured my early 20s as I packed my bags and moved across the world to Berlin. “April Skies” in particular always brings me back to that excitement you feel when everything is new, and anything is possible. It captures big love, stupid choices, and messy exhilarating nights. The smell of film chemicals and club bathrooms. Grainy Super 8 reels playing against a bedroom wall. A little camp, a little lost, and entirely wrapped up in the grimy romance of it all.
TRACK 04 | I PUT A SPELL ON YOU, SCREAMIN’ JAY HAWKINS
Screamin’ Jay Hawkins’ “I Put a Spell on You” is one of those songs that makes your bones move. Undeniably fun. Sadistic. Spellbound. This song is sex—enchanting and twisted. It’s exciting, it’s obsessive, and it’s haunting. What more could you want?
TRACK 05 | K., CIGARETTES AFTER SEX
There’s something about the hushed, dreamy melancholy of Cigarettes After Sex that makes you want to pull someone close and stay there forever. This was the music of whispered conversations in the corners of dark rooms, of lazy afternoons wrapped in warm sheets. Something about “K.” feels like trust, like a long exhale, like the quiet moments in an otherwise chaotic life.
TRACK 06 | I WANNA BE YOUR DOG, IGGY POP
Though a bit cheesy and on the nose, Iggy Pop’s “I Wanna Be Your Dog” is a song that captures my ongoing love affair with chaos. This song is for the nights when your body is buzzing with pent up excitement. When the chaos is so fun you forget about its aftermath. This is for the kind of reckless passion that makes you want to climb the walls.
TRACK 07 | RANDOM RULES, SILVER JEWS
Some songs are seductive precisely because they break your heart. “Random Rules” is a song that always catches me in those in-between moments, when my mind wanders back to past loves, missed chances, and what could have been. This is the soundtrack of nostalgia, the kind that stings in a way that somehow feels good. This is the song for all the almosts and maybes that linger long after they’re gone. It makes you want to dive headfirst into every memory, every mistake, every moment of passion you’ve ever known and sink right back into them.
TRACK 08 | GOODBYE HORSES, Q LAZZARUS
Always end on a perfect song. “Goodbye Horses” is a chameleon of desire—it’s the rhythm for every embrace, every dance, every love, every loss. Pulling you into a world all its own, this song is perfect for any mood. It makes every emotion feel a little bit sexier, every touch a little more sensual.
